In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
