3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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