Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
