I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize