just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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