I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
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This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You pole danced in your parka.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo