mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize