Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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