It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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