You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
