Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
