he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
