Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
