3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
