don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
