My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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