Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Your shirt... Was in my pants
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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