will power is for people who don't want to get laid
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
