apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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