Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
