Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
wow bdsm is so cute
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
