Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
