I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
