you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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