I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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