I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
