She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
