Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize