Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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