so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
