How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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