tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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