it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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