lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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