when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
