I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
