I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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