dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
