bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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