The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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