Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
