You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
