Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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