It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
