My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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