Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
