Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
