the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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