I'm eating all of the evidence.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
