do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Randomize
