just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
you made out with another girl for some wings
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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