all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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